The Old Git’s Approach to Bedtime

I don’t know how it rolls in your household but my old man’s bedtime routine is diabolical. It takes about two hours longer than my own ‘wham bam get in bed or else you’re dead..’ approach and consists of rolling around on the floor, laughing hysterically, a lot of tickling and running around like crazed puppies on speed. I can cook a meal, do the washing, watch two episodes of EastEnders, and the Old Git will still be getting the mini monsters ready for bed.

Quite frankly it doesn’t bother me if I’m off out with the girls… as long as I don’t get any phone calls from the kids wailing down the phone and demanding that I come home…my phone’s normally on mute anyway [evil laugh]. But if I’m at home and I ask the Old Git to put them to bed so that I can get on with the zillion other things I have to do, it narks me off when I can hear them having a party upstairs. Why can’t he just get on with the task in hand? Why over excite them before bed? And why does it always have to end with me stomping up the stairs and yelling at them to get a move on?

My evenings, post bedtime, are the equivalent of a relaxing spa day but without all the spa facilities. I like to switch off, chill out and recharge. So if the kids eat into that time too much I start twitching like a deranged person. But for the Old Git it’s a totally different experience. He hardly gets to see them during the week and so the weekends are precious time spent with them. Even though it pains me and goes against all my Hitler tendencies, I suppose the odd night spent where the kids run riot isn’t going to kill me. If it’s good for father/daughter/son bonding, then who am I to piss on that parade?

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39 thoughts on “The Old Git’s Approach to Bedtime”

  1. A hilarious, witty and brutally honest account of kid’s bedtime. LOVE it. Can’t wait for the next blog.

  2. I think he is just wasting time so he doesn’t have to empty the bins, specially on Mondays’ nights.
    Love your blog!

    1. I think you may be right..there will be a post very soon about BIN RAGE! Thanks Carmen, glad to hear you are enjoying it.

  3. This is absolutely spot on! Love you’re writing style Shazia. Hope this is going to be a regular blog that I can enjoy reading with a cup of tea and a choccie biccie!

    1. Thank you Pushpa! The plan is for this to be a regular blog which people can follow and chuckle at. Glad to hear you like it:)

  4. I’m sure many mums can relate entirely to your experience. This has made me chuckle. …more please! !

    1. Thanks Shaheena. I’m just pleased to hear that my chaotic household is actually not so unusual and that others can relate! Big sigh of relief!

  5. When I read the first sentence I thought you were writing about The Old Git’s own bedtime routine. I was like, “why does he roll around on the floor, giggling hysterically? That’s a bit odd for an Old Git”…. and then the penny dropped!

  6. I agree hundred percent. Gave me a chuckle. Like your style. A very frank expression. Thoroughly enjoyed and look forward to more. X

    1. Thank you Marya. It’s a relief to hear that others experience similar issues in their households! Please keep reading!

  7. Haha!! Love it! So so well written, had me chuckling from start to finish (I particularly like your reference to him indoors – the old git?!!! Haha!).

    Your night time escapades made me hoot! I’m soooo relieved I’ve left all that behind me and all I need to do these days is remember to stagger upstairs and take my clothes off and slump into my bed …. no kids to worry about and definitely no baby bath times to attend to! Phew! I’ll welcome you to my world in about 20 years time! Lol!

  8. A very enjoyable read….you’re a natural writer & storyteller! Already looking forward to your next post 🙂

  9. Brilliant Shazia!! Interesting read throughout. I went all the way to the end without stopping for a sip of tea!! Great story telling! You should be taking that club instead 😊

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